Why is my soul downcast within me

Why is my soul downcast within me?

Why can I not rejoice and uplift my soul with your praises?

Once I was strong and my feet was quick to your house

But now I struggle to wake to sing the psalms.

My prayers are shortened, and my heart is heavy.

What a burden this is to me!

My sin has made me weary and at night I cannot sleep

My bed is drenched with tears, for I have fallen away from my love

Your words I have strayed from and the result is unrighteousness.

How I have fallen from the depths of high and departed from your ways

I have delighted in worldly things.

What was it that I lacked when I was in your presence, for surely it was nought

And tremendous peace I received.

Truly it is, truly it is

The heart is deceitful above all things and mine has deceived me

It told me of false securities and puffed up my righteousness.

It made me lavish in my pride and promised me empty things.

Now I am weak and a terrible sight to behold

I sit in the dust and covered with ashes, the dogs have become my best friend.

I have become the tramp of the city and the least favoured among men.

My soul is downcast within me and I dear not look to the heavens

For who will hear the voice of a wicked sinner, who will be my aid?

Day and night I languish in my sorrows and weep until I can cry no more.

So I wait patiently for death, to die and fall eternally asleep

But even death flees from me, it torments me and ridicules me.

I am alone, alone in misery, who will be my saviour?

“Jesus comes for the sinners, repent and believe”.

I once believed, but will He take me back?

Surely I will fail again.

My soul is downcast within me! Who will lift it up?

Surely Jesus can thus I will wait

Come Lord Jesus, let me feel the joy of your salvation.

K.Oni