What makes me happy the most in this world is when I am walking in the light of life, that is walking in step with the Holy Spirit, it is walking as I am called to walk in Jesus. It is fixing my gaze upon the Son of God and obeying the will of His Father. It is me constantly thinking about Him and being unashamed of His gospel and of His ways. It is being not sorry about bringing Him into every conversation as wisdom sees fit. May I walk in wisdom towards outsiders. Yet I feel so sad, and I know why I do, it is because I have neglected Him and walked according to the lust of my mind. O foolish man that I am, who will deliver me from this body of death, for it really is a body of death. It seems that I curse myself, that in every victory gained I take two steps back. And I have been unwise to the temptations of the devil. Every time I walk in holiness, I see the evil one's hand bringing temptation to my face, and being complacent I do not fight it vigorously, and then I soon find myself in deep misery. But I will fight for joy! I will be the kindest and sweetest, and meekest, and humblest person. I will aim to live according to my calling and will forsake the standards of the world. Help me dear Lord, and please visit me with the sweet kiss of forgiveness for I have gravely sinned against you! Let this Christmas produce a deep transformation, a deep turn around, that next year I produce fruit worthy of your kingdom. Allow me, dear Lord, to be a writer and a theologian, to convey the truth of your love and holiness to this generation. That my voice may be of the prophets of old, and if you see this as not being worthy of me, then please use me in as little or as big your wisdom sees fit. I trust in your judgments. But in all this, let me have the sweet joy which you give to your servants. I will not recant nor repent of my service towards you.
K.Oni
No comments:
Post a Comment