Miscellanies 82: My sins are my own
I make no excuses for my sins. I am entirely guilty of them and I am to be damned for it. I know in my heart that I am not a good person, for therein is contain all those maladies that makes me ill with sinful actions. I know I am to be entirely at fault with my bitterness, laziness, lust, anger, self-seeking and deceitfulness. There is no one else at fault although others may have had a part to play, yet I am entirely guilty of them. If I am to know true mercy and grace, then I beg you not to take my sins away from me. Do not blame them on some past or on some other things; those things played a role and some very vital but they are still my sins. My conscience knows that they are mine and I have long ceased to find excuses other than to accept that I am not a very good person. I will not justify my sins. Now, in having my sins as my own, in knowing that I am really not a good person, and altogether a wretch making me a fitting candidate for the burning lakes of hell; in knowing all this, grace and mercy is all the more sweeter. That God should not count these things against me but lay them on Christ makes me infinitely happy and joyful. I am the wrongdoer and yet I am forgiven and loved.My sins are mine therefore I am commanded to repent and believe.