Showing posts from 2014

I knew a sad boy who was very lonely

I knew a boy who was very sad because he was lonely. He was so lonely that the loneliness often made him shiver, as if he was out naked in the bitter cold. Often in his loneliness, he would ask himself this question. 'What is the point of living? Nobody cares; and a certain person whom I admire very much cares not for me either'. He would sigh each night, wishing he had the strength to take himself away into that other dimension where all is silent. But each morning he wakes up alone, and do all things alone. And even though he works and smiles, yet it was all a cover to hide his deep dark loneliness. Nothing could fill it but one thing, but that thing was never going to be. The boy is indeed a very miserable boy, and he fears, no, he knows that he will spend the new year all alone. Such a terrible thing that is, that I told him at once to come and spend it with me. With a great sigh he accepted but said that he would not be a great company, because his heart will be somewhere…

Tired of waiting

I spent the night praying
Holding the posion saying God I aint playing
Tired of waiting, life is hard
Infact its pretty lonely
Wishing the mob would pick up stones to stone me.

Give me what you will, My dear Lord

Give me what you will, My dear Lord And take what you will, My dear Lord I will endure, whatever the grief, And follow you still, My sweet dear Lord.
Trouble and pain you have promised me No easy path on this road I tread, Suffering seems to be the book I read Joy and gladness still follows me.
O pity not me  the world I plead For Christ did die and rise indeed. All my errands for him are not vain Though they leave me with marks and stains. But know, surely as light comes with the sun That my reward will come when this earth is done.

please me in your prayers keep

Dear Christ, My wonderful mediator, please me in your prayers keep, To flee from sin, and from my lukewarmness to awake. Please on me sprinkle thy blood, and from heaven continually watch, That I may not in my misery keep, but in your righteousness be, And live in thy heavenly bliss. 

I must beyond my own ache look

There is more to life than her loving me back,
Starving children, needy friends
I must beyond my own ache look.

Broken down yet not dead,
Words without frown
I can another heal,
When beyond my own ache look.


Should I write a Christmas eve's cheer, or wallow in dirge?

Should I write a Christmas eve's cheer, or wallow in dirge?
What my heart feels, that true I should write, with distinguished sight.
Here, in this woods, sunlit trees, happy kids with birds feed;
And I, surrounded by household heed, still alone, even with many deeds.
Absent, though present, dance, yet not dancing, laughing, yet not delighting,
For she, that girl in 10,000, even in years way past 1000, Much missing, painfully longing,
To hold once more and more, hoping, even in my death, stolen, my memories of me,
Remembering her, not remembering me.

Will she me love and love again

I see her, beautiful as dawn,
Golden in all ways, like summer days.
No copper seen in attitude, but silver
Pure in heart, like a clear stream,
Christ reflection realised, when those serene eyes surveyed.
Will she me love and love again?
Or as another replaced my place.


I see my lack of faith

Here I see my lack of faith, namely not that I believe that God does not exist, but that he does not reward those who seek him. So I have put my hands up at private prayer, on study of him, on giving to him, on love, the kind that treasures God above all things. And thus I have recieved the reward in myself, namely a heart full of darkness, devoid of the inward sunshine. O for help and grace! For pity from heaven, that on me the eyes of mercy may once again look upon; and by supernatural power, the kind that raised Christ from the dead cause me to believe again; even more to experience.


Never to climb up Love's wall again

What she makes of me
I no longer know,
Dreadful to hear the truth revealed
Shudders my heart with terror.
To hear her string no longer tight,
That I am released to fall,
And I, never to climb up Love's wall again.


finally on my way home.

There is a day that will come when my strength will fail me; unable to hold on, to grab onto the horns of life with my hands, that day shall be glorious, fantastical, for I shall be finally on my way home. 


I pray best with great passion when it is not about me

All I want now is to know Jesus; to grow in my knowledge of him. In my evening prayer, as peace entered into my soul after pouring out to him my petitions, all I could say was come to me Lord Jesus, whether through a vision or a dream, or speak to me audibly, or in any way like you did to our fathers of old, reveal yourself to me in that way. I asked him, and instead of being granted that which I asked, more peace flooded my heart which brought me to such a state of satisfaction, that I layed on my bed with great serenity and joy. All in me is calm; the waves of anxiety have ceased. All thoughts of worry are clear out of sight. All of her worries which brought me to prayer that consumed me is gone. I leave all that now to His providence. He shall deal with it and restore that which was lost, or use it as a means which is all for her good. Although I will not leave off prayer regarding the matter. I pray best with great passion when it is not about me or of my ills, but about those to …

What a wonderful peace My Lord Jesus gives

What a wonderful peace
My Lord Jesus gives
When I surrender to him
And seek him in blessed prayer.
I poured to him my heart
He answered me with delight,
Not for the things I asked
But with his Peace
He satisfied my heart. 


I was feeling sad, then I read my Bible

I was feeling sad, full of all sorts of anxiety and worry. My mind was everywhere and nowhere. In the darkness of my room I sat, with no energy at all, save to lay on my bed and entertain myself with movies, which brought me no joy at all; but it helped pass the time. I thought about many a thing, such as the hopelessness of my life, the barrenness of all my works, the uselessness of my existence, and despairing of my future. At all this I sigh, wishing no company save two, but one who is the Almighty, I felt far and distant from me. This made my condition decline even worse. But I did today fresh encouragement take, when I opened my bible to the book of Psalms and started meditating on Psalm 119. There I found relieve in the words written, and in reading just a few words, all my energy returned to me, and joy filled my heart. All my worries faded and Christ seem present in my soul again. This, time and time again, has proven to be a constant remedy to my soul, namely the reading of t…

The writings of Sunny Caane: A distant admiration for those who have the will to close their own eyes

I have a distant admiration for those who have the will to close their own eyes, never again to see the light of day. They have a strength I do not possess, a will that I have, but a strength that I lack. For this hour, everything is dark, the sun is black to me and life is happiless. I do not see how to go by each day, how to carry on, how to live. Like Romeo, seeing his beloved on the bed, dead, though she lives, yet he thinks her dead, drank that poison whole, till life was found in him no more. I wish too for a woman in the market to sell me a bottle, full of poison, and in the loneliness of my existence, drink it till no more drops remain. Then in peace I will go into that realm that nothing exists, well at least, into that realm where this life no longer remains; and I shall be free from the constant pangs of my broken aching heart, and the deep despondency of being close friends with loneliness. O the depths of my longing this moment, to be free from this vision of life is bott…

Home-grown terrorism?

With the rapid rise and advance of ISIL in Northern Iraq and Syria, and the recent resurgence of radical groups in Libya, the Church has been grasping for ways to respond.

This week the new director of Britain’s surveillance agency, GCHQ, accused big US technology companies of denial, claiming they are becoming “control networks of choice” for terrorists.

It seems to me that British Christians often feel hamstrung in their capacity to offer tangible resistance to radical groups, despite knowing such groups are aggressively recruiting using the social media networks that run through our own country.

One London church community faces the reality of terrorism locally. London vicar and Westminster Theological College lecturer, Azariah France-Williams, leads a church that sits on the council estate that harboured the 21 July 2005 bombers and recently saw the arrest of four men on suspicion of plotting terrorism. 

The vicar recently met a family with a 7-year-old son, who fear he may be targete…

That it must end

That it must end remains not in my memory. Such thinking will only cause my eyes to weep, So I muse on happy things, But happiness, no weight of grief can bare. For even the winds of loss Will shake my house,
Crumbling it to the ground. 

Whoever has me loved in their heart

Whoever has me loved in their heart
Should tell me now, for this hour, this season,
When loneliness is with me as a hated friend,
Willing to part with her for another who would have me. 
Her, who is gone
has made me lonely, that any company now will do,
But not satisfy, only she could satisfy,
But to her who has me loved in her heart,
I am willing to offer myself to you
As a consolation, knowing that perhaps
You need me like I need her. 


The writings of sunny Caane - I miss her

I miss her – her whom I have been blessed with for a few years. Now, she is gone, taken away by the stronger wind of another. She yielded to his fragrance. But my fragrance made her cover her nose and run away. It stank, so much so, that any whiff of my smell made her sick. Thus, as all good men do, I stay away respecting her illness of me, and cried alone, deep into the midnight hours when the stars are weeping. Till this day I weep, and live in regret, that she slipped through my hands. 

Miscellanies 92: It is not as if I have it all together

It is not as if I have it all together. As if I have all the pieces of my life in place, as I would have them. Instead, they are scattered, some here and some there, and others, there and here. Do not find it strange if you do not find a constancy within me. If today I am full of sunshine, and tomorrow I am full of darkness, it is because my life is not yet a finished painting. 
K. oni

Pardon for the Greatest Sinner

“For thy name’s sake, O LORD, pardon mine iniquity; for it is great.”
—Psalm 25:11 Doctrine: If we truly come to God for mercy, the greatness of our sin will be no impediment to pardon...The following things are needful in order that we truly come to God for mercy: That we should see our misery and be sensible of our need of mercy. They who are not sensible of their misery cannot truly look to God for mercy, for it is the very notion of divine mercy that it is the goodness and grace of God to the miserable. Without misery in the object, there can be no exercise of mercy. To suppose mercy without supposing misery or pity without calamity is a contradiction. Therefore, men cannot look upon themselves as proper objects of mercy, unless they first know themselves to be miserable. So, unless this be the case, it is impossible that they should come to God for mercy. They must be sensible that they are the children of wrath, that the Law is against them, and that they are exposed to the curse …

Today is reformation day. I too will be reforming my life

Today is reformation day. I too will be reforming my life. On October 31, 1517, Martin Luther nailed his 95 theses to a church door in Wittenberg, Germany. Today, I will be nailing my one thesis on the wall in my room.
As one writer has written, that 'at the time, few would have suspected that the sound of a hammer striking the castle church door in Wittenberg, Germany, would soon be heard around the world and lead ultimately to the greatest transformation of Western society since the apostles first preached the Gospel throughout the Roman empire. Martin Luther’s nailing of his ninety-five theses to the church door on October 31, 1517, provoked a debate that culminated finally in what we now call the Protestant Reformation.'
Perhaps in a few years, as I consider this one thesis that I nailed on the wall in my room, that it would lead to the greatest transformation of my life in regards to my relationship with God. That this act of will, will culminate in me being more holy, and …

Intolerant views should be eliminated

Post: "Intolerant views should be eliminated." Response: I saw this statement yesterday in the comments of some news about a Christian... and no doubt we all increasingly see these kind of statements frequently posted around the Internet. IN fact, these are the kind of statements where I have seen people receive hundreds of "likes" on progressive-leaning news websites like Huffington Post, especially when they are talking about the views of theologically conservative Christians. It really appears that the persons who make such declarations, and their followers, fail to see the sheer irony in these statements. For to "eliminate" a view is somehow to believe that certain views are so unworthy of public discourse that such person(s) should not have the freedom of conscience to hold such views or speak about them publicly to anyone else. Now, if I understand tolerance correctly, all Christians I know of firmly believe in freedom of conscience. That is, they wi…

In the late evening

In the late evening, when sleep has
come upon me, I tell my hands that now is the hour to leave our work alone. We must rest our mind and go softly into
that land of dreams, where our beloved comes to us willingly, showering us with kisses. 


Mind love

It has become apparent to me that mind love needs to be
shown in a physical way. It is better to be extreme in
displaying love, that is, to show fantastic delight through
physical expression than to hide it secretly in ones mind.
This is because the object of your love will feel the warmth
of your love, rather than feeling the breeze that accustoms
the grey skies.  For although the sun shines beyond it,
yet it is no good in providing warmth for humanity.


He was very zealous in his cause

He was very zealous in the cause he
affected to serve. Her love was written in indelible
characters upon his heart; but when they first met, he
greeted her with skeptical contempt. This was because she had once betrayed him, violating all of his decencies.


Beautiful Woman

Beautiful Woman

God did put you forth as the standard of beauty

To walk upright in his statutes and ordinances

To live pure in heart and in submission to his will.

Beautiful Woman

Whose beauty surpasses the sun

That angels in heaven muse among themselves about

The surpassing worth of your glory

Which shines above all the daughters of eve.

Beautiful Woman

God is indeed your shepherd

Who has prepared a banqueting table before your enemies

That you should eat and fill yourself with his delights

And no arrows by night nor bullet by day shall harm you

Because you are protected under the shadow of the Almighty.


How Ought We to View Other Men's Sin?

"...we are but dead men until God quickens us by his grace alone...we never cease fighting against God until he has brought us to his obedience by the Holy Spirit...  ...we see secret compacts, poisonings spittings, malices, treasons, and wicked practices. To be brief, we see some so devilish that they fling themselves altogether headlong, as though they meant to make war willfully against God. These are things that may astonish us. And although we are dull, yet we ought to have some remorse when we see things to be so disorderly in the world. Nevertheless, St. Paul says that if we consider what is done, and how all things are turned upside down, and what license the world takes to itself to resist God, it behooves us to apply the same to ourselves and to conclude thus: The same could happen to me, and just as much as I see to be the case in them that are most wretched. For when we look on the diseases that are around us how some are eaten with cancers and other evil diseases, an…

Lately I've been thinking

And she's a beauty
She'll make a perfect queen
I want to see her every morning
Before I leave,
Leave her with a kiss
Then tonight we get to tease
Cuz lately I've been thinking
Something better for you and me,
Calculating plans
Your father says its alright. 
And she's a beauty
She'll make a perfect queen. 


Miscellanies 91: For a month my soul has been troubled

For a month my soul has been troubled. And what shall I say? 'Father, save me from this ache'? But from this ache I have learnt so much. So much that will only tend to my future good. So much that will only benefit all my relationships and the future ones to come. This ache was a neccesity. It was his megaphone to awake me from my slumber. It was his medicine for me to get well again. But I am still in bandages. I am still healing; still recovering from my nausea. Sometimes deep into the night I hold my heart because it is extreemely painful, it hurts deeply. I ask the Lord to take this feeling away from me, but he tells me that his grace is sufficient for me; or at least I know that that is what he is saying. I tell him that I feel alone. He replies that he alone is sufficient. I remind him that it is not good for man to be alone. He tells me to wait. I tell him that I cannot see a future for me. He tells me to trust him. That even though I walk through the valley of the shad…

Stop blaming the victims

Can rape ever be the fault of the victim? If you have been reading the papers this week, it seems some people believe so.

Sheffield United’s Ched Evans was convicted of rape and ordered to serve five and a half years in prison for raping a 19-year-old woman. Having served less than half of that sentence, he has now been freed and a debate has opened up about whether he should be allowed to return to the club.

Except that’s not where the discussion ends. Now, the nature of the incident is being examined by people across the land, piecing together the information they know in order to distinguish if he did in fact rape his victim, despite a court of law ruling that he had.

Through it all, Evans and his girlfriend, who has stood by him, have protested his innocence. This week, he self-published a video on YouTube, expressing his regret for his “infidelity” and stating his love and commitment to partner Natasha Massey.   

The BBC was forced to apologise yesterday for Michael Buerk’s comment o…

Fighting dirty: the battle for school places

This week, a mother was convicted of forgery after she submitted a fake tenancy agreement in order to secure a place at a high performing school for her daughter. She was fined £500 and sentenced to 100 hours of community service.

Many parents might have sympathy for her. The magistrate in the case, Michael Peacock, sounded like he did: "You are obviously a very good and conscientious mother and like all good mothers you want your kid to go to the best school available. We hear of people buying expensive houses in expensive streets and so on, in order to get into a certain catchment area".

But, as he summed up, his judgment was clear: "Whatever you do it's got to be within the law. What you did was dishonest. It was cheating, cheating the system."

There are few issues that create the kind of anxiety and competitive behaviour among parents more than the battle for school places. Recent figures show an increasing number of parents are giving false information to se…


Agrey cloud like a flag from despair hangs over my head. Sleepless, Going about my day with my face pale as wax, Fatigued, confused, angered by my past reflection, Hand icily cold, crumbling like a fairy dream, Broken, like some great river's ice at the touch of spring, Sleepless, Alone, like a storm tossed-wreck. Feeling unconscious to life like steel. Dreaming awake to fall asleep, As slumber falls on the eyes of a tired child. Sleepless, Because I'm still accepting that she's gone away, Feeling, As stars that flashes with the sun, Breathing, as a sea disturbed by a violent wind. Sleepless, For my love upon love upon love in her was packed, Now gone, Despair replaces the cloud I've lost.

I do see God's hand in everything

I do see God's hand in everything. The old divines put such a matter under God's providence. There is not a thing which occurs that God had no hands in it. He is in every detail, in fact he weaves it all together for the good of his awesome glory, yet sins not, and grants liberality to the creatures as justice and his love demands it.
Now sometime ago, on the 24th of December 2013, I decided to go and cut my hair for it was rather messy and unkempt. Ony my way to the barbers, I bought Ola Ola pounded yam and placed it in a blue carrier bag. I sat down at the barbers now waiting to cut my hair, but besides me sat a boy who clearly had a disability. I shunned him not, although at first when he placed his hands on me, I moved away as to find it a repulsive thing. Perhaps I did shun him, but afterwards I allowed the boy to rest on me.
Now, it was my turn to cut my hair. I hanged up my jacket and placed my blue carrier bag on the chair. After my hair cut for which I paid double…