Skip to main content

Book Review: Real Marriage: the truth about sex, friendship and life together


In Real Marriage: the truth about sex, friendship and life together, Mark and Grace Driscoll openly communicate the reality of their marriage, sharing their difficulties, struggles and success (how they overcame their difficulties) to the world. This book is frank, transparent and pastoral in that it aims to help marriages to stand on the solid rock which is Christ and to be rooted in the Gospel. It emphasises friendship to be a key factor in a good marriage. They write “All the talk about spending time and doing life together, making memories, being a good listener, growing old and taking care of each other, being honest, having the long view of things, repenting and forgiving can be summed up in one word—friendship." Repentance and forgiveness are to be continual in a marriage because both are sinners. A refusal to endure in the willingness to forgive and repent may result in living a bitter marriage and a loveless ordeal. Commenting on the story of John Wesley’s marriage which some biographers have called the “30 years war” the Driscolls write “The painful story of the Wesleys reminds us that there are no loving marriages apart from repentance and forgiveness, Marriage either gets bitter or gets better.”

The book is divided into three parts which have chapters consequently related to the title of the different sections. Part 1 deals with Marriage, Part 2 Sex and Part 3 The last day. Each chapter of the section will appeal to different audiences and because the book is written by the couple, there are different addresses directed to only one part of the sexes. Mark and Grace are complimentarian in their views on marriage but even those with differing perspective can learn and gain an helpful insight into marital issues and how to overcome them biblically.

Part 2 of Real Marriage deals heavily with sex answering questions of what a married couple may do in their marital bed. Mark and Grace list a variety of sexual acts and using three criteria’s to judge whether these acts are permissible. Mark and Grace promote a positive view of sex declaring that sex is a gift from God rather than sex being gross. Sex is to be enjoyed and should be used to God's glory.

Reading this book as an unmarried man, I have enjoyed the openness and frankness of Mark’s and Grace portrayal of their own marriage. In some way it has prepared me for some of the challenges that are likely to occur if one day I do get married and the best ways to prevent some of the problems occurring and how to tackle them when they do. This book has benefits to all, those in marriages and those thinking about marriage. One has to be aware of the explicitness of the details prescribed in chapter 10 where the authors answer questions on what sexual activity are permissible. In approaching these chapters one has to be prepared and guard their heart from wandering into fantasy of what these acts entail but rather if married to talk it through with their wife and if single and know not of these things to seek out their meanings in non-pornographic materials.

Purchase Real Marriage: the truth about sex, friendship and life together at http://www.amazon.com/Real-Marriage-Truth-Friendship-Together/dp/140020383X/?tag=thegospcoal-20

K.Oni

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

When God turns a deaf ear on prayers

Does God always hear people’s prayers, or do some pray in vain thinking that God hears them, when in reality He chooses to turn a deaf hear to their cries? Some may perhaps have a notion that all prayers are worthy, and God being who He is is by nature willing to listen and hear their prayers delightfully. They entertain the notion that it is their birth right for God to listen to their prayers and answer them accordingly. Also, there are some who come before the presence of the Lord with severe doubts, defeated by the devils whisper that they are such an unworthy soul that for them to lift up their cries to the Lord is an abomination. They are mute by their own wickedness, depressed and thus fail to pray.

What does the scripture say about God turning a deaf hear to prayers? It is to be said that God is sovereign and can choose to answer any prayer as He sees fit. He is altogether happy and never backed into a corner, God always does whatever He pleases for He is free to do as He wills…

What does it mean to live a godly life?

If you ever asked yourself the question, what does it mean to live a godly life? and if your not exactly sure what living a godly life involves, this extract taking from Charles Seet book 'A Christian in a non-Christian world' provides ample guidance on just what to do.

Now it is worth asking the question then, 'What does it mean to live godly?' It does not mean that we are just to confine ourselves within a set of rules and regulations. Some people reduce godly living to a list of 'do’s and don'ts.' But the meaning of godly living goes far deeper than that.

Godly living means living in the manner that God wants us to live. It means having the same feelings, attitudes and heart's desires that God has. It means that we love the things that God loves, care for the things that God cares for, and dislike those things which He dislikes. And since God loves righteousness, a godly person also loves righteousness. Since God hates sin, a godly person also hates …

Women of the Bible: Adah and Zillah

The Sin of Adam and Eve resulted in the fall of humanity. Every generation after them became wicked and that is why scripture affirms, ‘that there is no one righteous, no, not even one.’ Mankind became enslave to the passions of its flesh, its desires became its ruler and men followed the natural dictates of their hearts; and were it not for Sovereign grace, the race of men would now only be read of by angels in the library of extinct creatures. Adam and Eve witnessed the consequences of their sin in the death of their beloved son, Abel, by the hands of Cain who murdered his brother in anger and was thus sent away from the presence of God. My dear sisters, sin is not only sin when it is found in its extremes, sin is also sin in its subtlety and vanity. Sin is sin when one's affection is set on another and not on God, when one lives to please a thing or a being which is not God; this is also sin.
This becomes especially evident in the lives of Adah and Zillah the wives of Lamech. Th…