She did pray well for me, namely that I was of some significant in this vast world. That my words were not always like ashes before the wind, but they were like rain upon the earth. It nourishes and helps some poor souls out there. Also she said, that I was a rock, a steadfast soul, one who loved the Lord well and that he loved me well.
I have all the reasons to have anxiety in me, about my future, but to him I can look. But also that there are things that I can do, namely to work hard and to love well. I am to express my feelings without the fear of rejection, to stop thinking that it would do no good. I listened and listened and believed so that now I am very much encouraged to be a light in the darkness, to remove my lamp from underneath the table, and to make it shine brightly in the world, especially in my immediate world.
I would marry her tomorrow and be content with her for the rest of my life - but I do not think that I am a wine she would daily want to drink. Nay nor the one to richly bless her life. My path is marked with poverty, poverty in spirit and poverty in riches, thus it would make me sad that I never could give her enjoyment in this world. O the sorrows of love are buried in the pleasures of love, but when that pleasure fades, how stormy are those sorrows. They shall blow my feeble heart down.